Plus, there is the sleep-deprivation to deal with, finding appropriate childcare, and deciding whether to continue breastfeeding. So, what do you do when you feel like your maternity leave is ending before it ever really got started?

Maternity Leave in the U.S.

With the exception of a few states, the United States does not have a national paid family leave policy. As of 2018, research from the Organization for Economic Cooperation and Development (OECD) looked at 41 countries and found that the U.S. was the only nation without a paid parental leave policy, despite the fact that a majority of American mothers work outside of the home. What’s more, the length of maternity leave varies widely across the country even with the Family Medical Leave Act (FLMA). In fact, 1 in 4 American mothers have returned to work two weeks after childbirth, according to a report by the Better Life Lab and New America. For instance, the report indicates that FMLA only covers about 60% of the workforce despite the fact that the act offers 12 weeks of unpaid leave. This fact is due primarily to the restrictions found in the act, which only apply to full-time employees that have worked a minimum of 1,250 hours in the previous year for a company that has at least 50 employees in one location. Meanwhile, there are a handful of states in the U.S. that offer extended unpaid family leave beyond what the FMLA provides. For instance, California and New Jersey offer six weeks and Rhode Island offers four weeks of paid leave. In 2020, Washington state rolled out a 12-week paid family leave program. By 2021, New York will offer 12 weeks, according to the report. The statewide maternity leave policies are part of Temporary Disability Insurance, which is funded through a payroll tax on employees. The District of Columbia also offers six weeks of paid family leave, which is 100% funded by a tax on employers and not deducted from employee paychecks. But businesses and organizations tend to forget that maternity leave is not a vacation. In fact, it’s a necessity for both the new mom to heal and the baby to get a healthy start in life. Still, companies only offer voluntary paid family leave to about 14% of the civilian workforce. What’s more, workers with the highest incomes are three and a half times more likely to have access to paid family leave when compared to those with the lowest incomes. So, new families with low incomes are getting off to a really rocky start.

Maternity Leave Benefits Companies

Yet maternity leave programs have shown that they are good for businesses resulting in improved productivity, economic growth, and higher employee retention, according to the Better Life Lab and New America report. Plus, there is no evidence of higher costs or turnover for companies with higher-paid leave usage.

Tips for Getting a Longer Leave

Every woman at one time or another has wished that her maternity leave was just a little longer. For some, this feeling is fleeting and soon they are embracing getting back into the groove at work, but for others, the thought of returning to work seems a little too soon. If you find yourself in the latter group, here are some ideas for negotiating a longer maternity leave.

Put Together a Plan

Ideally, you should think about your maternity leave before the baby arrives and make it part of your maternity leave plan. But if you thought your company’s program would be adequate and then you later find that it’s not, it is never too late to be strategic about your return to work. Take some time to really think through how you could not only extend your maternity leave, but also make it beneficial for your employer as well. You want to show that you are still invested in your job, but just need a little more time at home. One creative way to tackle the transition back to work is to shorten your maternity leave by a week or two and then apply those 5 to 10 business days to 5 to 10 Fridays that you could take off. This plan would extend your time at home with your baby for several long weekends. Or perhaps you and your partner could take intermittent vacation days in order to reduce the amount of time your baby is with a nanny or childcare provider. Do whatever you can to create a plan that allows you to phase back into work on a schedule that makes you more comfortable.

Present a Proposal to Your Boss

While it may be tempting to just email your boss your plan, you will likely get better results if you schedule an appointment and meet face-to-face. Not only can you adjust your presentation based on the verbal cues you get from your boss, but you also will demonstrate that you are still committed to your job. What’s more, your presentation and request for more flexibility will be more effective when you come to your boss with a solution rather than just ask to extend your maternity leave. Make sure you describe how your responsibilities will be handled and how the workflow will continue. You want to do everything you can to make sure the company is not impacted too much by your absence.

Propose Telecommuting

More and more companies are allowing their employees to telecommute several days a week or more. Research has shown that employees work harder and are more productive when they are allowed to work from home. Be clear with your boss about how you see this working out. Demonstrate that you have given thought to how you will handle all your job responsibilities including taking calls and attending meetings. Additionally, some work-from-home moms hire a nanny to assist them while they are working. Be creative when you come with your telecommuting proposal. For instance, can you and your partner devise a plan where one of your telecommutes two days a week and the other telecommutes three? Or, maybe you both telecommute two days a week and the fifth day your baby is with a nanny, grandparent, or childcare provider?

Explore Other Options

Sometimes new moms find that it makes more financial sense to take a more permanent leave or explore a job change rather than going back to their present company before they are ready. For instance, the cost of childcare can, at times, eat up all the new mom’s income. On the other hand, if you are financially strapped with just one income, it would be unwise to quit your job. You don’t want to put your family and your new baby in jeopardy of drowning in debt. The stress that debt brings to a family is sometimes unsurmountable and your permanent leave will have the opposite effect of what you had intended.

Coping With a Short Leave

If you have already reviewed your maternity leave options, submitted a proposal to your boss, talked to human resources, explored short-term disability, and researched every avenue possible to extend your maternity leave only to still come up short, there are still ways for you to make the best of the situation. Here are some practical tips to cope with the fact that you have to go back to work before you are ready.

Have Lunch Dates With Your Baby

One of the hardest things about going back to work is being away from your new baby. If your childcare provider is close to your office, spend your lunch hour with your baby. Work with your nanny or childcare provider ahead of time to determine the best time to stop by. Perhaps you can time your visit so that you are there to breastfeed or bottle-feed your little one. And, if your schedule permits, make it a daily ritual. This extra time together in the middle of the day, could be just what you need to help you transition back to the work environment.

Be Strategic About Vacation Time

Once you’re back at work, be strategic about how you use your paid time off like personal days and vacation days. For instance, if you have two weeks off and five personal days, you could choose to use them a few days at a time. You could plan a few three- or four-day weekends to spend with your baby. Using vacation days strategically will help you feel like you have more balance in your life during the initial days that you are back at work. Additionally, it will allow you to ease into your work responsibilities a little more slowly.

Make Your Time Together Count

Aside from the necessities like laundry and meal preparation, make your time at home with your baby count. Put away the cell phone and the computer and focus on your new family. Spend your time rocking, cuddling, and reading books. You also can plan short outings, go for walks with the baby, and take small road trips. The key is that you prioritize family time when you are home. Housework and other chores can wait. Instead, nap with your baby. Taking care of yourself and your little one will help you transition back to work more easily if your tank is filled.